I listen to it. //
Hoping it is wrong. The sound //
of that little voice. //
It isn't much fun //
to prove to you I'm stupid. //
Wanted to leave doubt //
You are you and I //
am me. It's the contrast that //
kicks me in the gut //
You say you're lucky //
Are you overlooking the //
obvious? You're nuts! //
How do you think it //
makes me feel knowing that you //
did not think of me? //
I see you, hear you //
feel your presence daily //
Still you are not you. //
I don't believe the //
good you see in me. Retro //
ripping can do that //
Math doesn't add up //
when your actions take away //
years we had been we //
I've heard being hurt //
is all my fault. Add it to //
the list of everything //
Not angry, don't care //
Play the looky lou if you wish //
My tank is empty //
Not sure you know all //
you think you do about me //
And you never will //
Like perimeter //
fence my heart is enclosed in //
Concrete and rebar //
By accident you //
get a glimpse, but I promise, //
you will not get more //
Very hard to watch //
my feelings swirl down the drain //
foundation crumbled //
what is left? after. //
a complicated jumble //
of God knows what //
It is so far gone //
I can't remember if it //
was ever real //
Who you say you know //
Is the teensiest seen part //
All the rest hidden //
If you accept praise //
You must accept criticism //
Neither need be true //
awaken in dark //
that strangles. fight urge to scream //
why bother? alone. //
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