Blessings True

I was given some information last Friday. It was about myself. Now, being that it was about me, you'd think I'd have some idea what to do with it. But no. Don't have a clue. I'm seeing a theme here are you?

I've about decided that not having a clue is what life is all about. At least mine. But I doubt I am alone in this.
Used to be when I had small children I did not have the luxury of wondering what life was all about. I had diapers to change, fights to break up and tears to dry up. I'm still doing at least one of those three but not for my children. Having the time now to ponder is both a blessing and a curse.

I like to help people to the extent I'm able. But I notice this too is both a blessing and a curse. For even with the best of intentions you can screw up to an amazing degree. Part of it is the arrogance that is the foundation of offering the help. The arrogance of thinking people need it. The truth is most people do not need help. They are doing just fine even when they aren't if you know what I mean. I have written about an experience I had helping a young woman attend a photography conference by going to the destination with her allowing her to afford to go. It turned into a pretty sad ordeal, at least it was for me. For the longest time I struggled with this experience. Trying to let go, forgive (myself and her) and move on.

I learned about the nature of forgiveness from this. The foolhardiness of traveling with someone you don't know well and that intentions don't always amount to much when hurt feelings are involved. 
But I also met a really amazing person who wrote to me after seeing the blog post. And told me my words were helpful to her. It meant so much to know that through the hurt the help still existed even if in a form I could not have anticipated. I was fortunate to have the support of a man I call brother and the comfort of an email full of cussing and fussing on my behalf. I still smile at the thought of it.

Part of my response to the lady who wrote me after seeing my post was this: "It would be so easy to hole up and close my heart to other friendships but I'm hoping that despite my imperfections there are other folks who would welcome me in their lives." I am so very happy to share that this hope has been fulfilled. Over and over.

So I have this information. Don't know what to do with it. But I do know this. The answer is not to close my heart. To this information, to life's experiences and most of all to other people who are the truest blessings.